Walking into my past

Now that i have gained some sort of settlement in my life(financially) its time for a bit of retrospection. I sometimes feel so happy when some of my people say that i am one of the first ones to settle down, at least starting to. Other way round, i have lost my freedom, forced to become timely, a bit of stress here n there, no 'bird-watching' programs, in short no time for myself. So what is the solution? -- i found walking into the past could be a good option. Never thought working would be so ****.

No night-outs, for fun; no trips nothing for this broken heart. Now it has been 7 long years i did not meet her. Long-distance STD relation does not work, i guess. Just expressing solitariness over the phone only adds up to the agony, i feel. Those innocent n beautiful eyes, lovely smile, hairs falling onto her forehead, short n sweet moments i spent on her nape, hugs, kisses!! Now just HOPE n OPTIMISM, lets see where it leads me too.

Wanted to become a Doctor,got into Biotechnology; thought of a PG, ended up doing a PG Diploma; looked up for a job in Clinical Research, landed into Marketing[thank god this time at least in CR industry, maybe start of good times:-)]

7 years, a long time indeed,
guys n gals come out from high school to professions,
some get stuck into the nuptial knot,
some even gain success, deserving n hard-fought;

In this life when will i realize my cast,
Thats why i am walking into my past;

To find some answers and moments,
to help me today,
To smile to myself n get off with this bland face,
coz today i m just existing at a snail's pace;

In this life when will i realize my cast,
Thats why i am walking into my past;

To make myself feel that i was happy n content,
had tasks planned out and was full of intent,

learn from mistakes and stay corrected for days ahead,
for i do not want myself to be thrown off like snake skin-shed;

In this life when will i realize my cast,
Thats why i am walking into my past;

Today,

i try to convince somebody, but they r in no mood to be convinced,
i try to make them happy, but they dont show out their happiness,
i still try harder to make ends meet, but they feel themselves to be @the end of an infinte straight line,
maybe thats how god wanted us to feel LOVE,
hmmm okies,just make that somebody MINE !!!!!!! :-)

With a glimmer of hope and a pinch of optimism,
I have to realize my cast and
Thats why i am walking into my past.......